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JE - Matchmaker - Ohkura/Shige

Title: Matchmaker
Pairing: Ohkura Tadayoshi / Kato Shigeaki
Rating: R
Author Notes: Written for samenashi ♥ It's her OTP. Sometimes she lies and says she likes Akame, but trust me, it's really Ohge.


“Shige,” Ryo says imperiously, “Take this bento box to Ohkura’s place.”

“What? What?” Shige asks, incredulously, and looks at Ryo wide-eyed, “Why would I do that?”

Ryo crosses his arms and glares at Shige. Shige, in return, tries to stare back, but after approximately ten seconds he averts his eyes and squirms and blushes just a little, because Ryo singling him out like that is making him more uncomfortable than he’d like to admit.

When he looks up at Ryo again, Ryo is smirking at him in a way that makes Shige even more uncomfortable.

“Because,” Ryo says impatiently, “I defended you during the MC last night. You owe me. And trust me, you don’t want to stay in debt for too long.”

“O-okay,” Shige says, takes a deep breath and holds his hands out for the bento box, “Okay, I will take it there.”

When Ryo presses not one, but two bento boxes into his hands, Shige looks at him, surprised.

“Oh come on,” Ryo says with an eye roll, “One is for you. I’m not inhumane!”

“Thanks Nishikido-aniki,” Shige breathes, strangely happy.

Ryo just laughs at him.


It takes Shige a while to find Ohkura’s place. He’s never been there, after all. In fact, he doesn’t even really know Ohkura. Sure they are more or less acquainted, they’re all Johnny’s after all, but Shige can’t remember ever having a real conversation with Ohkura before. So when he is finally waiting at Ohkura’s door, and rings the doorbell, Shige shifts from one foot to the other, curls his fists into a ball and uncurls it again, and basically just wishes he’d been able to stand up to Ryo.

It’s ridiculous, really, that he’s so nervous. It’s not like he is nervous because of Ohkura. It’s just that Shige hates being in unfamiliar situations, and this is very unfamiliar territory.

When Ohkura opens the door, Shige chokes on air. Ohkura I dressed in very tight grey jeans – and no shirt. In fact, he looks like he had come straight out of the shower, a few drops of water still on his smooth chest and his hair wet, and – not that this is relevant in any way whatsoever.

“Umm,” Shige mumbles and gulps audibly.

“Kato-kun,” Ohkura greets him, unable to hide his surprise, “What are you – I mean, why? What.”
Shige doesn’t even notice that maybe Ohkura is just as flustered and confused as he is, because he has suddenly remembered what he is here for. He rummages through his messenger bag frantically, grabs one of the bento boxes and wants to hand it to Ohkura with a cheerful smile – sadly it doesn’t work quite as he planned.

“There you g—” he starts, but his sleeve gets caught up in the strap of his bag and when he nervously tugs, the bento box slips from his grasp.

Shige watches in complete horror how the box falls to the ground (it almost feels like slow-motion, like the important moments in a drama, repeating over and over and over again) and the contents spill onto the floor.

“I—shit, I – oh no,” he breathes, absolutely horrified, “That – I, God.”


They end up sharing the second bento in Ohkura’s living room. After Shige had stood frozen to the spot for a few moments, Ohkura had laughed awkwardly and helped Shige clean up the mess.

“You know,” Ohkura says, when they are sitting on his couch later, and stuffs a piece of tamagoyaki into his mouth, “Had it been the other way round, I probably would have dropped it too.”

“I doubt it,” Shige says gloomily, “I am the clumsiest person on earth.”

“Are you kidding me?” Ohkura asks, “Obviously you don’t know me very well, because I seriously fail at, like, everything.”

“Well, I don’t really believe that,” Shige says with a soft smile, “I guess I’ll just have to get to know you?”

They both blush and concentrate on eating after that.


Shige has almost forgotten about the whole incident and a few weeks have passed since he went to visit Ohkura. He’s relaxing in front of his TV, it’s Thursday night and he’s not expecting any visitors (Koyama had canceled their DVD session in favor of playing darts with Tegoshi, Shige remembers bitterly. Ryo had mocked him all day). So when his doorbell rings and he finds an embarrassed Ohkura on his doorstep, Shige doesn’t quite know what to say.

“Sorry to bother you on your day off,” Ohkura says apologetically, “Ryo-chan told me I had to give these to you and make sure you watch them.” He holds up a pack of DVDs. “He threatened to ruin my solo during the next five concerts, if I don’t.”

“Do you know what’s on them?” Shige asks, his voice skeptical. Knowing Ryo, it’s probably porn.

“No idea.” Ohkura shrugs, then his face brightens and he holds up the bag in his other hand triumphantly. “I brought Yakisoba!”


The DVDs turn out to be old Honjani episodes, particularly those where Ohkura failed the most. Ohkura shrieks when he realizes this and tries to cradle the DVDs against his chest, but Shige loves making fun of others just as much as other people love torturing him, so he tackles Ohkura and snatches the DVDs out of his hands.

Shige tries to ignore the fact that he touches Ohkura a great deal in the process, because really, it hadn’t been on purpose, and it’s definitely not the reason why he’s feeling unusually out of breath. It is just a rather hot day. For November.

Watching the Honjanis turns out to be really fun and Shige is pretty sure he hasn’t laughed that much in a very long time. The sports episode are especially hilarious and Shige is cracking up so hard that he almost forgets to breathe and tears of laughter run down his cheeks.

“Don’t mock me!” Ohkura complains, but he is giggling anyway.

Later, when Ohkura is about to leave, Shige asks him for his number. It’s a little awkward, but Shige really had a great time and he feels that he and Ohkura could become pretty good friends if they had the chance to hang out more often.

“Next time we can watch Ya-ya-yah episodes,” Shige suggests, “Just so you can see me fail, too.”

Ohkura gives a hearty laugh and tells Shige he is definitely looking forward to that.


Just when Shige is considering sending a text message to Ohkura, Ryo has another mission for him; CDs this time. For some reason Ryo seems to have chosen Shige as his personal delivery boy. Shige doesn’t complain, because a) Ryo is the boss, b) Ryo has stopped picking on him, and c) he had been planning to hang out with Ohkura anyway.

The CDs are (and this comes as a surprise to him) albums of Shige’s favorite bands. He has no idea why Ryo is giving them to Ohkura, but he launches into lengthy explanations about his reasons for loving those bands and the brilliance of several guitar solos. Ohkura responds, just as passionately, by analyzing the drum parts and by 2 am Shige has fallen asleep on Ohkura’s couch.

When he wakes up, Ohkura is making breakfast. It’s a bit weird, but also kind of nice and Ohkura really is a terrific cook – once he had practiced the meal in question and failed at least four times. By the time Shige gets up to leave, he has started to call Ohkura ‘Tacchon’. Shige kind of likes saying it.


When Ohkura shows up on his doorstep a few days later, a bag full of different alcoholic beverages in his right hand, Shige blinks at him thoroughly confused.

“I don’t drink,” he says immediately.

“Oh come on,” Ohkura pouts, “Ryo told me to make sure you drink some of it!”

“I don’t drink,” Shige repeats automatically.

“Oh well,” Ohkura shrugs. “I’ll just drink all by myself then.”

He plops down on Shige’s couch without even asking for permission (not that Shige would have said no), pops the cap of a beer bottle (Heineken, the label reads) and chugs down almost half of it in one go. Kanjani8, Shige thinks, must be really used to drinking alcohol.

“Come, come,” Ohkura says and pats the couch, “Sit! Let’s talk!”


It doesn’t take Shige long to wish he’d never said he doesn’t drink. Ohkura is suddenly not awkward at all anymore, all laughing and talking and big gestures and he isn’t even embarrassed when he knocks over an empty bottle. All other drunk people Shige had encountered before (meaning all of his band mates plus Akanishi plus some of Ya-ya-yah) had been a totally different kind of drunk. Kusano, for example, always turned into a total slut (even more so than usually), Koyama’s talking got twice as loud and three times as fast as it usually was and Massu – well Massu just wanted to eat.

Ohkura however isn’t annoying or slutty or anything like that; he just talks, eyes bright and excited, and Shige finds himself hanging onto his every word. If they were similar in types of failing, Shige wonders, maybe he’d be similar when drunk, too?

Contrary to popular belief, Shige doesn’t refuse alcohol because he’s a goody two shoes. His main reason is and has always been trying to avoid making a complete fool out of himself like everyone else.

Now, however, he’s intrigued.

“Give me some of that,” he demands, and without waiting for Ohkura’s reply, he makes a grab for Ohkura’s drink (“Tequila Sunrise, special Tacchon mix!” Ohkura had beamed earlier) and takes a huge gulp. Shige chokes a little; it burns in his throat and his eyes water, but then a pleasant warmth settles in his stomach and Ohkura smiles and urges him to drink more.


A short while and a few drinks later Shige realizes (with a giggle he’d never let slip under normal circumstances) that he is unfortunately the slutty drunk type. This realization should have horrified him, but looking at Ohkura spread out on the couch with flushed cheeks and tight jeans, Shige thinks it might actually be quite convenient, considering their situation. And hey, maybe Akanishi had been right all along, maybe being drunk would get him laid after all.

He finds this thought incredibly hilarious and laughs to himself for a bit, until Ohkura leans into Shige’s usual comfort zone and grins at him and asks, “What’s so funny?”

“I’m a drunk slut,” Shige states solemnly. Then, upon realizing his error, he bursts into laughter.

“Ehh?” Ohkura says, confused.

“I mean, drunk. Slutty. Slutty drunk.” Shige is having troubles voicing his thoughts (which has happened before, but only because sometimes he’s embarrassed to say certain things – never because he had trouble explaining) and so he decides that actions speak louder than words and finally presses Ohkura into the couch.

Not surprisingly, his aim is a bit off and they both end up tumbling to the floor, awkwardly.

“Oof,” Ohkura says and flails a little.

“Sorry,” Shige mumbles. Not even all the alcohol he’d previously consumed can suppress his complete and utter embarrassment. It seems that the battle between ‘slutty drunk’ and ‘awkward failure’ had finally been won by the latter. “Sorry – I’m. I. Sorry, okay.”

“What are you apologizing for?” Ohkura asks curiously, his brows knit together in honest confusion. “You just need better aim.”

And before Shige can even start to think of a reply, Ohkura pulls Shige on top of him and captures his lips in an urgent kiss. Shige doesn’t know if it’s because he’s drunk or just because Ohkura is so damn good at this, but he can’t keep himself from moaning throatily when Ohkura nibbles at his bottom lip and grabs Shige’s ass. She has never been the load type; not that he’s very experienced, but during the few encounters he has had, he’d always behaved.

“Mmm,” Ohkura says into Shige’s mouth and Shige involuntarily rolls his hips into Ohkura’s. They both moan, then, and Ohkura tugs at Shige’s belt impatiently. “Too many clothes,” he mumbles and fists his other hand into Shige’s hair.

It’s pretty much all a haze after that; Shige’s fogged brain doesn’t seem to work properly anymore, but he can feel; feel Ohkura’s hands leaving hot marks on his skin, feel delicate fingers wrapping around him, feel that delicious tension building and building until he can’t hold back any longer and tiny fireworks erupt behind his eyes; his fingers dig into Ohkura’s shoulders and Shige calls out his name, before collapsing on top of Ohkura and falling asleep instantly.


“I’m so sorry!” Shige says for the fifth time and Ohkura just laughs into his morning coffee. Shige flushes angrily; this was no laughing matter! It was embarrassing enough already, especially since he couldn’t even voice what he was sorry for. Namely not getting Ohkura off and passing out instead. But Shige would rather die than say that out loud.

“Seriously, don’t worry about it!” Ohkura says cheerfully. “Next time just don’t drink that much!”

“Next t—” Shige starts, but Ohkura has already turned his attention back to breakfast.


The next week NEWS and Kanjani8 have a joint interview for Myojo and whenever Ohkura looks at Shige, Shige blushes fiercely. This doesn’t go unnoticed by Ryo, who approaches Shige immediately after they finish.

“I see you worked it out,” he says and leers at Shige quite unsubtly. “That’s good. We can start working on the threesome now.”

“W-what?” Shige stammers and his eyes go wide. “I—what? Threesome? What three--?”

“Anyone hungry?” Ohkura cuts in from behind them.

“Yes,” Ryo replies immediately and grabs Shige by the elbow. “Shige just said the three of us should hang out tonight. Isn’t that a great idea?”

Shige frowns a little. He obviously hasn’t said any such thing. He’s also not particularly hungry at the moment. But he figures if this turns out like the last time Ryo made him hang out with Ohkura, it could possibly turn out well.

It seems that the Boss knows, after all.


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This was really good! (And I can't believe I actually knew who a non-NewS johnny was! LOL!) You captured Shige's awkwardness perfectly.
Glad you liked! ♥
Shige's awkwardness is one of the things I like most about him :D
I...uh...whu...awesome. Just awesome.

I love Ryo and his dirty, dirty evilness. And I don't know about anyone else, but I'd like to see that threesome in fic-form. XD
[eyes glaze over] Threesome. I. Um.


Sequel, per favore?

Gothic Author
You know I only have vague idea who Shige and Ohkura are (I know Shige has an imaginary cat which kind of makes him awesome in my eyes. But it took me like half way through the fic to realise that they're from different groups. Yes I fail) but aksksl this was awesome and I read your 'Pincushion, or how Fitza defected to Pin' and sort of died laughing and I like stalking your comments on Fitz and Sam's journals and God this makes me sound weird and stalkerish, but this was awesome. And I think I just fell in love with Shige. *_____*

I think this explains it better than any comment I could ever leave:

me: OMG
me: I
me: WHAT
me: ISO
me: djahgjkdshsl OHGE
iso: asdlkfasldkfjalskdfjlaskdfjalskdfj OMG SORRY WAIT
iso: lksdfjalksjflasdflkasjdf WHERE OMG WHERE OMG

sorry I'm so creepy. :((
I can make you a creepy icon...

*makes you a tequila sunrise*

This is just what I've wanted to read recently. There SO needs to be more Ohkura fic. And Shige [said right I KNOW T_T].

(which really means YOU'RE GENIUS, GOD. yes i did just call you god.)

"...He threatened to ruin my solo during the next five concerts, if I don’t.”
OMG, LOL, i could totally see that happen.

this was so funny and shige was so cute and everything, just ♥, lol.

not to be nitpicky, but a couple of minor spelling errors?

And trust me, you don’t want to stay in dept for too long.

(Koyama had cancelled their DVD session in favor of playing darts with Tegoshi, Shige remembers bitterly.

Shige is having troubles voicing his thoughts (which has happened before, but only because sometime’s he’s embarrassed to say certain things


Uh, is the stuff in bold your attempt at correcting or was that how it was before or something.
'Cause it's debt, cancelled, and sometimes.
It would have been easier to tell if it had been modified if your bolded words were either all right or all wrong, but apparently not.
...did you actually come up with a reasonably logical set-up for Ohkura/Shige? I'm impressed, I think.

But anyway, the mutual failing and awkwardness and stuff was adorable, and Ryo manipulating people into getting together is always fun.

du bist mein superstar

They have to practice. Face to face. My OTP is smexy/mmm. Du bist mein Sauerstoff und mein Sonnenlicht. heart

Their fail is so awesomely awkward I'm surprised they haven't sunk Honshu. And Ryo. Pulling the strings so he can get twice the sex with half the effort. LOVE. complete, undying, flailing squeeful LOVE. :D
eeeeeeh?!~ XD

ryo will give me a heart attack someday! LOL
(or the ryo in this fic)


shige's reactions and and I KNEW RYO WAS SETTING IT FROM THE START THAT-!! XDDDD ohmygawd. win. VERY NICE. ♥

RYO IS BOSS. *points at icon XD*
Ryo is an evil genius.

Thank you, enjoyed that no end!

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